While waiting for the release of "Moneypenny: The Experimental University Years" ...
So you know I saw "Quantum of Solace" recently, and had another viewing of "Casino Royale" right before that. In addition, I'm always popping in an older James Bond movie every other week, it seems. Ergo, it's time for another ranking of Bond films.
(Note: I actually looked at my last ranking recently, and while I've since forgotten where many films placed, this list is sure to be different. Maybe it's because I'm older. Maybe it's because I've seen certain movies more recently. Maybe it's because I'm off my medication. You know what? Doesn't matter. Don't like what you see? Bugger off.)
23. Moonraker: Always been disappointed with this, and time has not treated it well. Even a Bond woman named Holly Goodhead doesn't keep it out of the basement.
22. A View to a Kill: What p!sses me off most about this is its kickass start -- the snowboarding and the theme song -- and that it's all way downhill from there.
21. Die Another Day: Or, "Why We Had to Drop Brosnan." Similar to Roger Moore, things were getting tired with Pierce, and Halle Berry and a stupid diamonds/North Korea/laser satellite plot didn't help.
20. Tomorrow Never Dies: Saw this again recently -- it's one of the few I don't own -- and was pretty bummed. Michelle Yeoh can't redeem this ridiculous story.
19. The World is Not Enough: Yeah, Brosnan doesn't fare too well on the list. This movie looks good and has a nice opener, but Denise Richards and a somewhat silly villain are big drawbacks.
18. The Man with the Golden Gun: Kind of boring, actually, plus a villain you really can't hate too much, and the unfortunate return of that redneck sheriff from "Live and Let Die."
17. Live and Let Die: I like Jane Seymour, and Moore isn't bad in his first turn. But the voodoo/New Orleans/Harlem stuff didn't seem a great fit with our favorite Brit.
16. Diamonds are Forever: Speaking of bad fits ... I don't like Bond in Vegas. And I don't like Connery looking his age. But I'd be remiss if I ignored an overlooked Bond girl: Plenty O'Toole.
15. You Only Live Twice: I need to see this again, but I've never been jazzed about the Japan setting and passing Bond off as an Asian guy.
14. Never Say Never Again: A "Thunderball" remake, but Connery looks better than in "Diamonds," and is kind of funny in his old age. And Barbara Carrera as Fatima Blush ... woof.
13. The Living Daylights: The Timothy Dalton era, short as it was, has grown on me, and I like his first turn more each time I see it.
12. Quantum of Solace: This seems about right for an entry that everyone agrees is a drop-off from Daniel Craig's first turn but isn't bad at all, especially with the early action and the revenge theme.
11. Octopussy: As Dalton has risen, Moore has fallen in my eyes, and I don't dig this salaciously titled movie as much as before. Still, the knife-throwing twins are cool.
10. GoldenEye: Brosnan actually debuted well, showing more edge than I expected. Good combo on emotion and gadgetry, with a couple of hot women and the introduction of Dame Judi Dench as M.
9. Licence to Kill: I've really come around on this one. Much more down with the revenge and rogue agent stuff, even if some of the other folks are cartoonish here.
8. For Your Eyes Only: I'll confess a soft spot here, appreciating Moore's bounceback from "Moonraker" and the cool ski chase scenes.
7. On Her Majesty's Secret Service: Speaking of skiing, some good action here, too, although the story -- Bond gets married! -- and George Lazenby holding his own after the Connery legend are the real story here.
6. Thunderball: Some people say this is bloated, but I think it slows down only in the water, and by that time we've had plenty of good action and a smokin' redheaded villainess. Oh, mama.
5. Casino Royale: Too high? I say no, considering it's a successful reinvention of the franchise when the odds were stacked heavily against a 1960s Cold War spy surviving in theaters. Craig handles his debut perfectly.
4. Dr. No: The first and one of the best, with Bond a little rough around the edges -- although not as much as in "Royale" -- and Connery setting the tone for a tremendous run.
3. From Russia With Love: Watched this again this week, and it's solid after all these years. Great Cold War back-and-forth, and perhaps the strongest sidekick to Bond in Ali Kerim Bey.
2. The Spy Who Loved Me: Easily Moore's best, and an amazing combo of plot, gadgets and arguably the best Bond girl, Barbara Bach as Triple-X. Not enough? How about the introduction of metal-mouthed Jaws?
1. Goldfinger: It's been a while since I've seen it, but I still can't think of anything that knocks it from the top spot. Villain, plot, girls, henchman, gadgets ... this has it all. Not to mention Connery at his finest, before he started to get bored. Yes, you could say it has the Midas touch.
So now I'm wondering where this leaves us when it comes to the best Bond. Conventional wisdom is that it's Connery. Let's check the averages, based on the above (highly scientific) ranking. Remember, the lower the number for a movie, the higher the ranking. So a lower average would bode well for the actor hoping to claim the title.
Connery: 16+15+14+6+4+3+1 = 59 / 7 = 8.43
Lazenby: 7 = 7 /1 = 7
Moore: 23+22+18+17+11+8+2 = 101 / 7 = 14.43
Dalton: 13+9 = 22 / 2 = 11
Brosnan: 21+20+19+10 = 70 / 4 = 17.5
Craig: 12 + 5 = 17 / 2 = 8.5
Since we pretty much have to throw out Lazenby, that leaves us with this list of best to worst Bonds, based on their respective movies:
Connery
Craig
Dalton
Moore
Brosnan
I can live with that. Dalton didn't stick around long enough to turn in any dogs, and Craig still needs to prove himself a little more. Heck, he could dip just as Moore and Brosnan did (and Connery for that matter). I guess we'll just have to see. James Bond will return.
posted by Jefferson @ 10:41 PM
5 comments
5 Comments:
Good to see some love for For Your Eyes Only, which I think is always an underrated Bond film. I do think you have a View to a Kill about 5 spots too high, though.
this last Bond film was the pits. I'm glad I viewed it for free, otherwise I would of been pissed if I wasted money to see it. It doesn't deserve to be ranked!
Jeff R. Studd, I applaud you for giving Timothy Dalton -- and more specifically, "License to Kill" -- some much-deserved love. Everyone enjoys taking shots at his two-movie turn as 007 as a low point for the genre. But I think Dalton was actually an exceptional Bond, and "License to Kill" is one of the more entertaining (and not-totally-ludicrous) Bond offerings. Especially with the rogue, "on the edge," out for revenge Bond factor that you mentioned. Throw in two of the hottest bond girls of the modern era, a pretty good villan, a solid plot-line, our introduction to Benicio Del Toro, heads exploding in decompression chambers, waterskiing behind float planes, popping wheelies in big-rigs to avoid rocket-launchers, a classic Wayne Newton cameo, and vital chemistry lessons about cocaine's solubility in gasoline, and you've got a top-10 all-time Bond film in my book (and apparently yours, too). Long live Dalton!! (Wait, is that a line from "Roadhouse?")
Jeff, I think we've had this discussion before, but you continue to be WAAAAY too hard on Roger Moore. He was your first Bond, and shouldn't you always have a soft spot for your first? I think all of Moore's offerings (other than A View to a Kill, of course) need to be higher on your list.
I must admit that You Only Live Twice is probably my favorite Bond, but Goldfinger is probably deserving of that top spot.
Finally, since Never Say Never Again isn't an official Bond film, any purist should remove it from his list or place it at the bottom, unless you also want to include the first Casino Royale (with Woody Allen as Jimmy Bond). Besides, Never Say Never Again really sucks.
--The Count's Master
I saw You Only Live Twice again recently. Still not that good. Drags in several places, and Connery kind of mailing it in.
Here's the problem with the Moore movies.
-- The early ones (Live and Let Die and The Man with the Golden Gun) are silly stories with bad settings and dumb characters (The 7-Up guy, Tattoo and that redneck sheriff, although Jane Seymour is hot).
-- In the later ones (Octopussy and View to a Kill), Moore is old and bloated. Not convincing in fight scenes, and the dialogue is painful ... really painful.
-- That leaves the middle: The Spy Who Loved Me, Moonraker and For Your Eyes Only. I watched Moonraker a few weeks ago and didn't hate it as much, in part because Moore is younger and not as cheesy. But the story is still stupid. The other two have good stories and Moore in his prime.
So yeah, in the end there are only two really good Moore turns (Spy and Eyes), two really bad ones (View and Moonraker), and the rest are middling, and pale by comparison to the other guys.
Post a Comment
<< Home