Thursday, November 06, 2008

You know it's bad when Footloose boy and Nell are taking matters into their own hands: A vigilante double feature

So what's been going on this week? Any big news?

Before I joined the rest of the nation in being glued to election coverage Tuesday, I knocked out a couple of mostly unappealing movies in which good people get wronged, then get even. Something like this always makes me think of "Death Wish," or maybe "I Spit on Your Grave." Neither of those movies is really any good, and these two weren't, either.

So is this one degree of separation or two?: "Death Sentence"

I vaguely remember this coming out and being poorly received. The story is by the guy who actually wrote "Death Wish," and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't longing for Chuck Bronson, sh*tty mustache and all.

The opening credits roll over home movies of Kevin Bacon and Kelly Preston raising their two sons. We see the little boys grow up, and gee, aren't they a sweet and swell crew? What could possibly disrupt this perfect existence?

Stopping at the wrong gas station, as it turns out, where a gang kills Bacon's son. That crushes him, of course, and without getting into all the details, he goes rogue. I don't need your stupid laws! I was the Hollow Man, dammit!

This movie is somewhat unique in how depressing and bloody it is -- the director did the first "Saw" movie -- especially when things get even worse for our hero and he goes even more rogue. (Roguer?) But this really isn't a good thing, and I'm not sure there's much more I can say about a film that is both dreary and silly. But hey, if you need a pick-me-up ...

More like "The Broken One": "The Brave One"

This got slightly better reviews than the above, which isn't saying much. Time was we considered Jodie Foster above stuff like this. (Yes, even with "Maverick.") And really, if you've seen "The Accused," do you need to see her get abused yet again?

Foster is engaged to Sayid from "Lost" when they make the bad call to let their dog run loose one night in Central Park. They get attacked by a branch of the same psycho punks that wronged Bacon's family, and Sayid dies. She lives but is a shell of her former self. Afraid to walk the streets -- ironic, given her radio job of chronicling New York -- Foster eventually seeks comfort in gun ownership. Again, what could go wrong?

So yeah, she starts getting a little reckless with the pistol on random folks, and the police -- led by Terrence Howard -- wonder what's going on. It goes on long enough that I wondered if the real bad guys would ever get theirs, as the trailer seemed to promise. I won't ruin it for you, but there's a bit of a twist that, while interesting, doesn't really make this any better. Actually, it's kind of a ripoff.

In short, Foster and Howard are fine, but I never bought the overall premise and the climax didn't save the story. Throw in another unpleasant assault, and I would have been OK skipping it. What can I say? I like my violence a little more detached. Maybe it's the video games. I mean, it's not like those ghosts are really killing Pac-Man, right?

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