For once, Costanza was right: "Before the Devil Knows You're Dead"

I mean, Marisa Tomei ... wow. But let's all agree on this: If you insist on showing Philip Seymour Hoffman's a$$ in the same movie as Marisa Tomei's ta-tas, you really ought to show the ta-tas first. Otherwise, you risk viewers doing what I nearly did: throw up at the sight of that fleshy back end jiggling during sex. Not. Good.

I wanted to see this Sidney Lumet -- still working at 83, baby! -- movie last year but never made it to the artsy-fartsy theater. You may recall me instead seeing "The Mist," somewhat sheepishly. But get this: "The Mist" actually was OK, and "Before the Devil Knows You're Dead" wasn't that great. Throw in the gas money I saved, and it's a wash. Maybe.

Our story has Hoffman and Ethan Hawke ("Explorers") as brothers who are screw-ups in different ways. Hawke is obvious: He's little more than a deabeat dad who can't get or keep his sh!t together. Hoffman's flaws are hidden: He's a closet dope fiend whose perfect marriage to Tomei isn't all that perfect. (Their doing-the-dog-in-Rio opener notwithstanding. Minutes later, we see her naked with her brother-in-law. So that's how it is in their family ... )

After watching a jewelry store robbery early on, we soon learn the Brothers Dumba$$ were behind it. Through a series of flashbacks and flash-forwards -- not so much confusing as annoying -- we see how the heist came together, the various mistakes made along the way and the painful consequences. Let's just say that dear old dad, Albert Finney ("Looker"), isn't pleased.

There's all sorts of angst and compounding of mistakes, with Hawke falling apart rather quickly -- the scenes with his daughter and ex-wife are particularly pathetic -- and Hoffman taking a little more time before it all comes crashing down. And crash it does. Give Phil this: When he decides to go off the reservation, he doesn't just stick a toe over the line.

Like I said, the flashback/forward technique was bothersome, and I generally got the sense there was more atmosphere than depth here. Hawke did the better job with his character than Hoffman, which is surprising. Hoffman's perfectly fine, but I didn't totally buy who he was supposed to be. And I'm not even talking about bagging Marisa, since she wasn't the brightest bulb in the drawer.

In the end, "Devil" was a letdown. It asks you to except a lot without giving much of a payoff. Everyone here has done better work, although in Lumet's case you have to go way back to at least the '80s ("The Verdict") and even the '70s ("Network," "Dog Day Afternoon" and "Serpico.") Worst of all, you know how he dangled Tomei's boobs in the first few minutes and gave us a better look 20 minutes later? That's it for the movie. C'mon, Sid, we've been waiting for a peek at those ever since "My Cousin Vinny." You gotta give us one more look for the road.