Thursday, January 18, 2007

One tool to see them all: "The Lord of the Rings" trilogy

Yes, I did it. Not all in one day, and not even all in one week, although it was close. But I finally watched the extended versions of the three "Lord of the Rings" movies back-to-back-to-back. The Woman at the Center of My Universe initially was game for the journey, but she pooped out after about 40 minutes of the first movie. That left your faithful blogger to forge ahead alone, with no one remotely resembling Samwise Gamgee to watch my back.

Most of us should know the plot by now: Mythical world is in danger of falling into darkness unless a little man can destroy an all-powerful ring. (Hijinks ensue.) Rather than elaborate on that, let me share a few thoughts about seeing the whole trilogy in a short span.

First ... man, these director's cuts were long. We're talking about 11 hours combined for the three movies. Just in case three-and-a-half hours each for the first two, "The Fellowship of the Ring" and "The Two Towers," isn't long enough, the third, "The Return of the King," clocks in close to four hours, I think. This isn't watching a movie. This is like getting engaged. "Are you sure you want to do this? Are you sure?"

That said, the movies are rarely boring, provided you go into it knowing it's one big, long odyssey. That's means a little more exposition that you might want at times, and I'll confess to losing interest here and there. That became more acute given my commitment to see the trilogy in one burst. There were a few times when Frodo and Sam were toddling along with Gollum and I was like, "I know, the squirmy little guy loves only the Ring and can't be trusted. Let's move it, people."

I also didn't care much about the would-be romance between Aragorn and Arwen. While Viggo Mortensen does pretty well as the long lost heir to the throne of Gondor, the times when he's waving his sword around and pursuing his destiny as king were a heck of a lot more fun that watching him mope over an elf. Dude, the king can get any woman he wants. Why cry over that Aerosmith guy's kid?

Other nitpicking: There was probably too much hobbitt overall for me, with Merry and Pippin chewing up more screen time than necessary in the second and the third installments. I also noticed much more here than when I first saw the movies how Gimli the dwarf morphed from a tough little guy in the first movie to comic relief in the third. I know the point was to show how he and Legolas the elf had become friends, but I thought the elf (Orlando Bloom, who wasn't bad) held up a lot better. He also looked a lot cooler killing orcs and Uruk-Hai.

Of course, if this is the worst I can find in such a sprawling epic, then we're probably doing OK. And I can safely say that the battle scenes, special effects and scene settings were just as impressive when seen all at once. The battle in the mines of Moria in "Fellowship," the siege on Helm's Deep in "Towers," the relentless assault on Minas Tirith in "King" ... especially the Minas Tirith battles. Very cool how sh*t just kept coming.

Perhaps most telling, by the time push came to shove in Mordor, I found myself a little more emotional about the final leg of Frodo's trek to Mount Doom. Compared with seeing the three movies over three years, watching them in the span of several days made me feel more invested in the journey. It was kind of nice, actually. After the all flash, no substance "Star Wars" trilogy that was out at the same time -- well, before, during and after the "Rings" trilogy -- coming across a fantasy story where the dialogue and personalities don't make you cringe is noteworthy indeed. Now if you'll excuse me, I think I saw the Narsil, the sword of Elendil, for sale in SkyMall.

5 Comments:

At 12:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You just couldn't leave it be and had to compare it with SW. Apples and oranges my friend. Clerks II has the best take of the whole nerd war about this subject.

 
At 12:10 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"There's only one return - and it's of the JEDI - not of the king. 3 movies of people walking to a f'ng volcano."

 
At 6:52 PM, Blogger Jefferson said...

That debate alone may be enough for me to rent "Clerks II," a movie whose very idea makes me physically ill.

 
At 10:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

So, uh, where does "Spaceballs" rank here?

 
At 11:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Knight's Tale

 

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