Thursday, September 28, 2006

Surf's upside down: "The Poseidon Adventure"

I'd never use this phrase otherwise, but since the movie was made in the '70s ...

What a turkey.

Seriously, I was pumped up to see the original boat-goes-bottoms-up movie when it came on one of our HDTV channels. I remembered seeing part of it as a wee lad, and I always thought the story of people fighting for survival in a capsized ocean liner was pretty cool.

I was wrong. It could be that this movie is hopelessly dated, with the special effects and death-at-your-back scenes woefully simple compared with today's CGI universe. But I'm not sure that's it. I think the problem is a hokey story and hammy performances -- a good combo when "Jay and Silent Bob" is in the title, but not so much in a disaster flick, even a would-be popcorn movie.

Our story has a supposedly star-studded cast -- Gene Hackman! Ernest Borgnine! Red Buttons! Roddy McDowall! Shelly Winters! Stella Stevens! And Leslie Nielsen as "The Captain!" -- aboard the S.S. Poseidon when a "rogue wave" tips the dinghy over. That leaves Hackman to lead a hearty band of survivors to the bottom of the boat (now the top), dodging peril at almost every corner. The suspense!

No question there are some entertaining bits here. For one, Nielsen in a straight role. Really! I had a hard time taking him seriously, but after a while you realize he's not going to crack any jokes. Weird. Instead, we get Stevens and Winters as comic relief, with a little Borgnine for good measure.

Hackman is all business, though, and as much as I like the guy, this is not his finest hour ... or finest minute. Our man Gene seemed intent on overacting in his role as the heroic preacher, and it got pretty irritating after a while. "We have to keep going!" "This is the way out!" OK, I get it. Don't get your turtleneck in a bunch.

It's all rather silly as the movie wears on. Sure, Stevens looks great in her white cocktail dress, and the lounge singer (Carol Lynley) isn't hard to look at, either, even if she's always bawling. I'll also give "Poseidon" a few points for killing off some characters. Then again, does that really count if you're happy to see those folks die? I think not.

2 Comments:

At 11:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This sort of role pretty much summed up Leslie Nielsen's 30-year career before "Airplane!" But if you really want to see him in something strange, check out 1956's "Forbidden Planet." Leslie Neilsen, leading man. Weird. Although probably not as weird as "The Morning After" winning an Oscar for Best Song.

 
At 10:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

In the late fifties there was a program (I believe nationwide) that offered a free "kid's movie" once a week during the summer at the local theater.

There was a reason that "Forbidden Planet" was offered as a "free show" for SEVERAL summers. It was right up there (down there?)with "Mothera".

Kids loved them, though.

 

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