Thai is on my side: "Ong-bak"

First, an apology. Not only was I gone over the weekend, but the new TV season is kicking my ass when it comes to watching movies. Sure, I've got plenty of fine films TiVoed, and "Hitch" has been sitting in the Netflix pile forever. (Figured the missus and I could agree on that one.) But all of the season and series premieres have taken up a good chunk of my nighttime viewing. In fact, don't be surprised to see a post on that before long, because I know you care.

(Program note: That may be the last time you see my wife called "the missus." Turns out she not only reads this blog -- hey, it surprised me -- but doesn't particularly like that term of endearment. She's also not high on being called "the wife." I say it's better than "my" or "a" -- you're THE wife, the one and only! -- but she doesn't see it that way. We'll see what else I can come up with.)

Fortunately, one Friday night offered a movie opportunity, with the mis- ... I mean, My Reason for Being ... out of the house for a couple of hours. Seemed like a good time to check out a movie that won rave reviews but flew under the radar earlier this year, "Ong-bak: The Thai Warrior."

Maybe the best way to set this up is by sharing one of the taglines: "No computer graphics. No stunt doubles. No wires." What we get instead is a martial arts movie from Thailand with plenty of whirly-twirly, flippy-dippy but none of that "Matrix" tomfoolery. Sounds interesting, right?

Well, it wasn't, at least at first. Following a fun opening scene with the village boys engaging in some weird Capture the Flag game, things crawl along. The basic story is that some guys from Bangkok steal the head of the village's stone idol/god -- that would be Ong-bak -- and our hero, Ting, ventures from the village to the evil big city to get it back. Turns out Ting is some kind of monk-in-training, too, which means he knows a lot of cool martial arts moves but really shouldn't use them. What are the odds that policy holds up? It worked so well for Caine in "Kung Fu," right?

Once in Bangkok, though, the action picks up, and the second half offers plenty of impressive fights as Ting gets roped into more and more violence. (The alternative title for "Ong-bak" was "A Future of Violence," I believe.) Probably the most distinctive ting -- I mean, thing -- other than the lack of wires and stunt doubles is the frequent use of elbows and knees in muay thai, the martial art featured here. I guess we've seen that in other martial arts movies that involve Southeast Asia -- "Kickboxer" comes to mind -- but it was weird to see so much of it here.

No question that Tony Jaa, who plays Ting, is well-versed in the art of smackdown, and his innocent face works well in the role, too. He's not hamming it up like Jackie Chan nor using wires like Jet Li. (The football scene in "Romeo Must Die" made me howl.) But this movie mostly is a curiosity for martial arts fans, which explains why it didn't show up in the U.S. until this year despite being released in 2003. It's like someone said "Chan's getting too old, Li's cheating ... who else can we find from the Far East?"

I'd be remiss if I didn't mention "Ong-bak" features a fairly entertaining villain: a wheelchair-bound guy who speaks with one of those little microphones on his voice box. After Ned from "South Park," it's pretty damn hard to take this guy seriously, and I think the folks who made this film know it.